Work and wellbeing  

Why advisers need to practice self-compassion

Meeting needs to help yourself and others to function comfortably

Part of this struggle was exhausting herself in trying to live and work as a neurotypical person without understanding her additional needs.

Up to now she has been seen as neurotypical by other people. North says: “The additional challenges (of being diagnosed) are huge. Particularly when you have been viewed as neurotypical person your entire life, people can struggle to accept that you do in fact have additional needs".

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These needs include:

  • Giving yourself, clients and colleagues more time to process
  • Long breaks between meetings
  • Quiet working environments
  • Detailed agendas and clear instructions.

Both personally and with mindfulness to colleagues and clients, advisers can help significantly by taking these needs on board and making simple adjustments that foster better self-compassion and compassion towards others.

Now that North understands herself better, she says is making clearer decisions about her own needs. 

She explains: “I am making much bolder decisions now about what I need (and don't need) in the workplace in order to function and be comfortable. Self-compassion is very important for neurodivergent people as we are often misunderstood and asked to do things we don’t feel comfortable with.

“I take a lot of time for myself and make sure I don't avoid difficult emotions. It is a work in progress.

“Being open about the challenges you face and the needs you have is really important. Not everyone will understand or support you but this then helps you find a safe group of people who do.” 

Anita Boniface is a freelance journalist